How do you know you are wasting your life?
Here are some signs to help you know when you are falling into the rabbit hole. Sometimes you can just be in a bad headspace and fall into not being productive without realizing. Sometimes you're just going through a quarter life crisis, which is kind of better because that is usually a phase. Although, if you don't get out of it, it can very easily become your life. If you're not sure what the difference is check out What it feels like and how to overcome quarter life crisis.
Here are signs you need to look out for so you don’t get to the end of it all full of regrets. You can get a hold of your life right now, today.
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Everyday is the same
All you do is eat, sleep, repeat, you have nothing new, nothing exciting, nothing to look forward to. Everyday is pretty much the same as the last. You get to a point you don’t even acknowledge you’re living anymore.
You simply just exist as you go through an automated routine your brain is accustomed to. It is very easy to fall into this headspace when you don’t have anything exciting in your life, and nothing you are working on. Everything has to be a conscious effort. So make plans, introduce new things to your life, try new hobbies, set goals.
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Endless stalking
When you put in so much energy in other people’s lives, rather than yours. You go through other people's Instagram to see how they are doing or what they are doing, when you could be doing in your own life. A lot of times, stalking is stemmed from comparison or competition, wanting to be better than the next person or feeling inferior.
Whatever your initial reason was to get into stalking in the first place, it could even be after a breakup, you stalk your ex, or your ex's new partner. We all know deep down, you really just stalk for either comparison or to compete. The aim always is one or the other.
I will use an analogy here; ‘imagine you were in a race, and you are leading, or you are second place. The minute you try to look beside you to see how the other racers are doing, you instantly lose momentum and your pace slows.
Now those who were possibly behind you, have been given the opportunity to surpass you. You may get to the end of the race at last place, or 5th place. The bottom line is, if you had only focused on you in this race, you could have maintained your position and gotten farther.’
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TV/Video game addiction
Hear me out. There is nothing wrong with watching TV or video games. However, if it becomes your life to a point it consumes your every being, then you bet it is a complete waste of time.
The only way putting in so much energy in playing video games or watching tv pays off is when it actually does, pay off. If you ain’t getting paid, cut it off. Your couch does not need to take the form of your ass, I bet you, it’s tired too. Get up and work on your life instead.
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Don’t ever take risks
When you’re always scared of standing out, and never want to try out new things just because you don’t want to be the odd one out. A lot of that comes from not wanting to be judged by others, simply because you are doing something which may seem a little out of the norm, or a lot out of the norm. There is really no measurement of normal, and who are those who decide what’s normal anyways?
The point is do not give people that much importance in your life. You should be the most important person in your life, and all that should matter is making you happy. Once you start to wonder what anyone else will think, you need to stop yourself right there and remember, it really doesn’t matter what they think. What they think is their problem, just like your only problem should be what you think. Be genuine to you!
You can only ever be you, try to give the world the most authentic version of you. We are blessed to have you.
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Living a life you don't want
There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a little uncomfortable and inconvenienced on your life’s journey of becoming the best version of you. No one said it’s going to be easy, there will be ups and downs, bumps in the road, but all that matters is you keep on going.
If you are not happy with your life or your current situation, then you need to actively work on changing it. That will even give you the required motivation to work on what you are working on. Even if it’s a job you dislike, just knowing that it is simply stepping stone to where you want to be and not a destination, really helps your mental state. It makes you want to grind more, to get through this phase of your life.
It can be a phase or a destination, it really is up to you. Is this your final stop in life?
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Being around negative people
There is literally nothing positive that comes out of being around negative people. Protect your mental as much as you protect your physical health. Negative comments naturally affect your mindset and in turn affects how you view yourself and your capabilities.
It makes you limit yourself, and being in that headspace will always cause you to play small. You stay mediocre while the people putting you down are there flourishing and growing. Why would you want to do that to yourself?
Even if you feel like, people’s comments don’t affect you directly, trust me when i say your mind absorbs that ish subconsciously and you find yourself undermining yourself. Your brain starts to put you down without you acknowledging it.
Nothing grows in a negative environment, not even plants, and all they have to do is exist.
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Being a gossip monger
Let’s keep in mind that gossip is usually negative. Ask yourself, why you want someone else to fail so bad, just so you can have something to talk about? Is your life really that sad, all you want to consume is bad news? Misery loves company, are you the miserable one who wants to get more misery in the world? Does it excite you to see other people's downfall?
Now ask yourself, does it excite you when other people laugh at your own downfalls? Does it make you feel good when other people go around whispering about you behind your back?
Moral of the story, if it hurts your feelings, it probably hurts other people’s feelings too. Unless you just enjoy inflicting pain on others.
I would say though, it’s a lot more exciting watching your life grow and glow, than it is watching other people's lives fall apart.
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Having an idc attitude
First of idc means ‘I don’t care’. If your entire life is just you moving like a zombie having zero expectations in life, you need to change that. You have zero expectations because you have not worked on anything in your life. Having an eat, sleep, repeat lifestyle.
Don't just exist, remember to LIVE! You’re not a plant, you were created to do great things, not simply breathe.
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Complaining a lot
Never in the history of complaining has it ever changed the past. What’s done is done. If you’re not happy about it, change it. If it can’t be changed, find peace and move on. There is no point reliving the past and not moving forward.
Exist in the present so you don’t get to your future only to realize you never really enjoyed the now. Right now is the best time to make that life change, you are never going to be as young as you are right now.
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Being in unhealthy relationships
For the love of God, they ain’t sh*t. If they are comfortable with making you feel bad about yourself, they don’t deserve you. Save yourself the emotional roller coaster by calling it quits before it eats you all up from the inside.
Here are some points of knowing you are in an unhealthy relationship;
- You put in more effort than the other person to make it work
- The other isn’t remorseful when they wrong you. Actually put in the effort to not do it again
- If the bad times are more than the good times
- If there is no mutual respect
- If you keep wondering about your importance in the other person’s life
The reality though remains, more often than not, you know when a relationship is unhealthy. You just need to love yourself enough to not take up with that bs anymore. Despite all the ups and downs in a relationship, it really does take two to tango.
Do not drain and exhaust yourself in a relationship chasing someone that does not want to be chased, or even more disrespectful, chasing someone that is chasing another. If they care about you, it will be clear.
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Not having goals
When you simply exist with no goals, nothing you are thriving towards, simply just breathing and going through life. If you are not where you want to be in life, you have no business getting comfortable with zero goals. You need to decide that you are important enough to want better. Then you set those goals and start smashing them.
It is of course very important to keep yourself accountable through this goal setting journey. You can very easily do that by joining our accountability Facebook community here. Get yourself annual undated planner to start actively making plans. No successful person ever achieved anything without planning. Take control of your life!
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Professional procrastination
A little bit of procrastination never hurt nobody. In fact it helps your brain narrow down on important tasks to complete and cut out the unnecessary stuff. But, being a professional procrastinator is different, you really just don’t put in any effort in any of your tasks, because you procrastinate too much to the point you no longer have enough time.
You then produce mediocre results, and this becomes a norm for you. Pretty soon it is all people will expect from you, just mediocre. You don’t have to limit your talent like that, you are the real deal, you just need to start showing up as that.
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Constant motivation hunt
There is nothing wrong with looking for motivation here and there, especially when the going gets tough. But the minute you make that your life, just endlessly searching for motivation. You end up not actually taking any action in your life.
If you need motivation that bad constantly, then you are likely on the wrong path and need to reevaluate your life. Do it now to avoid wasting more time. You can take your time to find yourself, just don’t waste your time on the wrong things in life.
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Eisenhower's time management matrix
All I have to say about this is whatever you do try not to be in quadrant D. Cut down on useless activities in order to maximize productivity.
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Always splurging
Do not spend money unnecessarily. If you have goals and aspirations, your money should be going into that. Invest in yourself. Stop giving back the money to the government.
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No selfcare
You are the most important person in your life, show yourself some love. You can only flourish on the outside if you are flourishing on the inside.
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Coulda shoulda
A bit like complaining, stop benign stuck in the past. There are so many probabilities of having different outcomes everyday depending on our actions. The possibilities are truly endless, and if you are choosing to make this your designated duty, trust me, you will never run out of work to do. But does it pay tho….
You can never change the past, but you damn sure can make use of your present to get the results you wished for in the future. Nothing trumps a pity party in terms of time wastage, the absolute worst. Cut. it. off.
Is this you everyday or are you just having a quarter life crisis?
SN: This was oddly so therapeutic for me. I did not anticipate this feeling at all. I may need to incorporate these more often. I did a video on this if you are more of an audio consumer, you can check it out. But truly, most of these points just had me confronting myself. I too need to do better. Love yourself enough to want the best for you. Growth is a journey, be kind to yourself, cut off people that don’t serve you or make you question you.
